Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ) about "The Chess Show" revised 1/19/98
(Hopelessly out of date - We're not doing the live show any more but
 are happy to sell you a DVD )

1. What is "The Chess Show"?

   "The Chess Show" is a locally produced, cable access TV show,
   viewable in the Portland, Oregon metropolitan area. Viewers can 
   call in and make moves. There are challenging quizes, music videos,
   fabulous prizes, and a sexy hostess! all for the sole purpose of
   permanently imprinting the concept that "chess can be fun" into the
   subconsious of thousands of TV channel surfers.
 
2. When does the show air and on what channel?
 
   See the current schedule. 
   reruns 

   You can call Portland Cable Access at 288-1515 dates.
 
3. How can I write to "The Chess Show"?
 
   You can send email to [ChessShow et ChessShow daught com] or postal mail to:
   ... actually, no postal mail right now.
 
3.5 How can I be sure to get my letter read on the air?

   My advice, if you definitly want to get a letter read on the
   air, is to write back and tell Cybele what a fabulous hostess she
   is and how you particularly like her perky enthusiasm and wonderful
   outfits (which she spends so much time and effort on). She's a sucker
   for those kind of comments and would definitly want to read your
   letter on the air.  Email is nice. Hand written letters are even more
   effective. You might, perhaps, even send us an anotated move list of
   your most inspired game, were you totally crushed and demoralized your
   opponent. Including a photo is always a big plus!


4. How can I be in the studio audience?
 
   Send email to [ChessShow et ChessShow daught com] or postal mail, letting us know that you'd like to attend.
   
5. So what is the show all about anyway?
 
   Basically, we allow people in the viewing audience to call in and make
   chess moves. We also throw in an occasional quiz where the caller identifies
   some clip from a movie or tv show, where chess is somehow involved. We also
   have a few chess related music videos, that we like to show, special
   guests and maybe a special report on local chess stuff. 
   We don't usually follow the serious chess matches and what Bobby Fischer
   or Gary Kasparov are currently up to, not because we wouldn't like to but
   because we're on a zero budget and there are plenty of other good sources
   for that stuff anyway. We basically just try to have fun and encourage
   people to play chess.
 
6. So who is this Cybele person? What does she do?
 
   Cybele is our fabulous hostette. Her job is to talk to the callers, 
   introduce guests and audience members, queue the clips and quizzes and
   basically be distracting and obscure your view of the chess board. We
   think she does a great job and is a tremedous asset to the show. It
   would be pretty dull without her.
 
7. Who's that guy who does the music?

   That's Botielus! A super talented musician whom we are lucky enough
   to have on the show, due to his close working relationship with
   Cybele. They have a couple Duo acts together, "Hasenpfeffer" and
   "Samsonite and Delight-ya". The versatile Botielus produces his own
   brand of New Age synthesizer mood music (3 of his albums are now available)
   and is also currently playing keyboards in an Elvis impersonation band,
   "Rock and Roll Legends" and with "The Hamtones", a mostly 50's & 60's cover
   band.

8. What about that commentator guy, who operates the computer? Who's he?

   That would be our Chess Master of Ceremonies (CMC). There are several
   people who occasionally fill in for this position. Among them are
   Bill, Robert and Jeremy, all fine chess players. In April '97, we
   were honored to have chess author and columnist Casey Bush as our
   special guest CMC. Check out his recent book on Arthur Dake, Grandmaster
   from Oregon. 

9. Will you make public service announcments for chess clubs or chess
   related events? Can I be ON "The Chess Show"!?!
 
   Yes. You can send mail or email to the above addresses and we will make
   announcements. You can even send us a short (say 5 minutes) video tape
   and the likelyhood is that we will play it on the air if it has anything
   even slightly to do with chess.  We are particulary fond of chess music
   and if your band wants to make a song that has something to do with chess
   or some chess references we would probably let you play your tape or
   perform it live (if sound setup is simple). If you really want to score
   points with Cybele, draw her portrait in a "chessic" scene and your a
   shoe-in to be able to display it on the show.
 
10. Do you have T-shirts? (updated 01.7.28)
 
    Go to The Store. The designs leave much
    to be desired, but I'm working on it. If you'd like to design your own
    T-shirt, work with me. I can provide some images to work with. My only
    condition is that I get to distribute your artwork on the cafepress site
    royalty free. (The CafePress souviers are the minimum/no profit price).
    If you want to print an Iron-on transfer, email me and I'll send you my 
    current design for free.

11. I'm a good chess player and I think your show is ridiculous. Why don't
   you do some serious chess commentary?
 
   If you're a really good chess player, then you're probably better at the
   game than we are.  Some of the cast and crew are genuine chess devotees,
   but lets face it: chess makes pretty boring TV, and there's nothing that
   we could show you in an hour that you couldn't get from a good chess book
   or magazine. We like to think that we are encouraging the beginners
   out there to play some chess and have some fun. Remember, it's just a
   game!

12. I watch your show, but I'm never able to call in. The line is always busy!
   Why don't you get more phone lines!?

   We are limited to the two call-in lines that PCA provides. Frequently
   we have to share one of those lines with another show in studio B, so
   we might only have one phone line. This sucks! We know it, but were
   stuck with it. Call PCA at 288-1515 (fax 288-8173) to complain.

13. I heard about "The Chess Show" but I don't live in Portland, OR or don't
    have cable. Is there any possibility of getting a tape of the show?
   
    OK, for you poor deprived people who are too cheap to pay for cable or
    just have the misfortune to live someplace else, I might be willing
    to send you a tape of a show, but it'll cost you! Send twenty bucks
    to the above PO box with your address and when I can get around to it,
    I'll send you a highlights DVD. Don't hold your breath while waiting, because
    I'm a busy person and I have a backlog of requests. If you want faster
    responce time, make sure to say that your some big producer for a major
    network and that your looking for something like "The Chess Show" to air
    nationally. (note: DVD only. I don't do tapes any more.)

    PayPal $20.00 to [ChessShow et ChessShow daught com]

14. Do you have a World Wide Web (WWW) page?

    OK, you might think this is a stupid question since, more than likely,
    you found this FAQ on the web page itself, but just think, for a moment,
    and consider that this FAQ might have been Emailed or posted to a news
    group and then the question doesn't sound so dumb. Anyway, the address is:
    http://ChessShow.com


We welcome your comments/input/help with our show.  We're always looking for
volunteers and video programming. If you want to make you're own special
report to air on the chess show, we encourage you to do so.
 
Clinton Wittstruck
producer